According to my tech expert – yes, we share a bed, but even if we didn’t I would probably still think he was pretty smart – we will eventually be able to go into a store and pay without ever breaking out a wallet. Initially we’ll be able to use our cell phones (of course there will be an app for that). But at some point, we’ll have an implant. Not the perky kind. The knows-all-your-business kind. Yikes.

My resident tech expert also says we may someday have a kind of personal DVR device that records our entire day. The negative nelly in me goes immediately to all the terrifying ramifications of such a thing. Nobody needs their entire day recorded. Look at what happened to poor Jessica Simpson. She said that thing about Chicken of the Sea, and she may never live that down. If you followed me all day, well, you would be shaking your head and laughing your ass off at the things I say. Not laughing ha-ha, but laughing oh, wow, she is such a ding bat.

I cannot even begin to think or write any more about a personal DVR right now. Brain. Hurts. Too. Much.

I, for one, may not be ready for the personal DVR (I reiterate: CREEPY), but I am ready for a chip implant in my brain, under one condition: I need it to transcribe the blog posts and book ideas I think up and get them on the screen. Truth be told, that’s all I want the chip to do. Please don’t access the inner regions of my brain. Nobody needs to go there. I don’t even go there.

My problem: I think up some really great stuff. It’s funny, smart, well researched, full of expert quotes (Yeah, I think those, too – to date, there are no experts living in my head. To date.). Thanks to the daily grind, though, that smart, funny stuff gets trapped somewhere between my head and the computer screen. Sometimes I even start the post, make notes, etc., and yet, when it comes time to write, the mojo is gone. Can I call it mojo? I don’t know if I am cool enough to use the word mojo. Perhaps that’s one more thing the chip could do for me: edit, just a little, like when I try to talk all hip-like. I’m not hip.

If I can get sort of specific here, should there be any tech guru, chip creating people reading, this is what I want: a chip in my brain that I can turn on when my ideas for writing, be it fiction, or blogs, or even email correspondence, start to flow; when my brain returns to its usual activity (keep kids alive… do much laundry… eat food… give kids food… do more laundry… where are kids… how about coffee….), the chip will automatically shut off.

I will buy that chip. I will pay cash money for that chip. So, all you weirdly smart and kind of creepy people who develop such things, give me a call when you have my Personal Brain Recorder Thingy ready.

As for you normal, non-creepy, non-brain invading people, I’m wondering a few things:

1. What do you think about the future of technology, especially the potential to get inside our heads or record our days?

2. Do you have any tricks for getting the ideas out of your head and onto the page/computer screen?

3. Will you still read my blog if I tell you that I really like Jessica Simpson? Not her music, per se (I honestly don’t know much about it), but Jessica in general? I loved Newlyweds. Wrong? Maybe. It is what it is.