I can’t confirm this, but I may be spending some time in a location with high temperatures that are lower than Austin’s low temperatures (did you follow that?). And I may have limited internet access.

I’m not saying any of that’s true, but if it were, I might run some golden oldies instead of new posts.

Here’s a post from a year ago, when I didn’t go to BlogHer. I re-read it and saw that I seemed pretty committed to going this year, but that didn’t happen. I think that says something about my commitments, but I prefer not to explore it.

In honor of all the BlogHer wrap-up posts floating around out there this week, I give you a recycled post. Fancy, right?

*****************

I’m all out of the funny. If you want to roll on the floor, go visit Kludgy Mom. Gigi’s post kills me and I enthusiastically second her thoughts.

Me? I’m watching the Hallmark Channel hoping for a good cry. Golden Girls just came on and the theme song incited weeping. Pathetic. Let’s all roll our eyes and hate me for a second. Okay. Done. Now, let’s talk BlogHer.

I’m not going, but I’ve been playing it real cool. In fact, until this week I haven’t even uttered the word, BlogHer.

Yes, I’ve been secretly checking out possibilities of scoring a ticket for sale. I’ve debated getting a flight to NYC and lurking around the conference, hoping for a scalper with a BlogHer ticket. Nothing says, Hey, she looks like a nice woman who probably has a really great blog! I want to meet her, for sure! more than skulking, uninvited, around the periphery of a NYC hotel.

The simple explanation for my non-attendance is that I’m new to blogging. Wonder, Friend is coming up on five months old. Holla! No? I thought I would try it out. I’ve always wanted to be able to shout, Holla!, and sound cool. I’m over that now.

Since I’m new to the game, BlogHer wasn’t even a blip on the radar until the tweets started flying around about a month ago. I mean, I’d heard of it. I’m not a shut-in or anything. But I thought it was only for real bloggers. Turns out, anyone can go. Anyone! Even me. Except, as has occasionally been the case in my life: I’m a day late and a dollar short.

(Lots of dollars short, actually. Are you aware that in addition to the plane ticket, the hotel, and the conference admission, there are a few other things I need in order to properly do BlogHer? This post by Mommypants, detailing the BlogHer necessities, is hysterical. Go read it. Funny, yes?)

So I missed it this year. No more playing it cool. I’m a small, tiny bit jealous of all the bloggers who will get to put faces with web sites. And then there’s the location. New York City, the hometown of my soul. The parties. The staying-in-a-hotel-without-the-kids. And, obviously, the chance to talk all things blog with people who are as weirdly attached to this forum as I am.

Aaagh. Yep. Jealous.

BlogHer, prepare yourself. This is one mama who is planning a blogging boondoggle next August.