Hair today, gone tomorrow. Har, har, har. But I’m not laughing.
Very short hair going on over here! I wanted a change. Isn’t that how it always starts? I was about to burst into flames, thanks to Central Texas August weather, and my long hair was annoying me. So I exercised zero judgement and told my hair stylist to cut it off. To her credit, she did exactly what I asked. And now I have no hair.
My mantra: it grows, it grows. This is not permanent! Thank God. If hair did not grow I would still be stuck with the near-mullet, complete with partial perm, that I begged – begged – my mother to let me get in the fourth grade. Let’s just say she allowed me to exercise my independence at exactly the wrong time. She should have put her foot down on that one!
I wonder, do you have a favorite haircut story?
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Please visit The Red Dress Club for a description of this week’s Red Writing Hood exercise. All I can say is, yikes. (And ladies, I cannot get that button to post here. WHAT am I doing wrong? Help!)
Oh, and I think we were maybe supposed to write a non-fiction, first-person piece, but I didn’t re-read the directions before I wrote. Clearly, I mis-remembered the assignment. This is a fiction piece. Oops. And I don’t have time to rewrite! So… not exactly following the rules, but it is what it is this week.
Completely ridiculous. Embarrassed. Angry? There are more feelings rumbling deep down, at gut level, but ridiculous and embarrassed are the most prevalent emotions. Angry is right there with them.
The water is running cold. It’s soothing, listening to water rush out of the shower head and gently splatter as it hits the tile floor. If only that sound could drown out mortified internal dialogue.
How did this happen? One minute, a night out with girlfriends. The next? Joey’s apartment. Joey. Joey! Damn everything, this was not supposed to happen.
A graceful hand reaches for the water, checking the temperature, and then it stays, allowing now warm water to cascade and create a small waterfall.
Drinks were involved. There’s a headline. Was there anything else, though? The cocktail glass, shimmering with beads of condensation, was in view all night. There’s no way anything was slipped into a drink. Is there? As horrifying as that would be, at least it would be an excuse. It appears that this whole event is going to be inexcusable.
Perfectly pedicured feet carry a compact body, practically flawless, into the shower. If only the inside matched the outside. Hip flexors, aching and tight after last night, complain about having to assist with stepping under the hot water.
An internal play-by-play unfolds while water pounds tense shoulders, also sore from God knows what kinds of acrobatic passion. A memory materializes. Instead of getting in Jen’s car, a drunken decision led to Joey’s car. Joey! Damn.
Steam fills the small shower stall. At least the stall is clean. That’s one thing Joey does right. The condo is neat, almost compulsively maintained. Most men have showers that make a girl long for shower shoes. Not Joey. There’s no mold, no hair, and a squeegee hanging in the corner must be responsible for the sparkling glass.
“Good morning!” Damn, damn, damn. Joey is up. “There are clean towels on the shelf, and pancake batter ready to throw on the griddle.”
Oh, now what? Is it unacceptable to stay in the shower all morning, letting unbearably hot water scald away this mistake? Unfortunately, the water is cooling down; a hot water heater can only go so long. The same cannot be said for Joey. Chalk that up to another thing in the pro column. Aching, fatigued muscles say last night was no exception.
The plumbing sputters a bit and cold water hits red, overheated skin. People pay big money for this at spas, but it’s not an especially pleasant sensation. The irony is not lost. Time to face the unpleasantness. Time to get out and say good-bye. Again.
Lapsed homemaker. Looking to hire a full-time housekeeper who will work for the sheer joy of a job well done and free coffee. Interested parties, DM please. 
Oooh..I like this. I want to know what’s going on. I mean, a clean shower AND he makes pancakes? Why is he a mistake? Love this! You did a fab job!
Thanks, Cheryl.
Honestly, I have some ideas about why he’s not the right guy, but haven’t decided yet what direction to take. These two people live in my head and it just might be time to let them out… see where they go.
Great job! I agree with Cheryl, I want to know more about these two.
Thank you!
This reminds me of a beginning of a book I’d like to read. I am drawn in to the two characters. VERY nice set up for me wanting more..
That means a lot coming from The Empress! Thank you!
Love the story, but I must post my own hair disaster story. 🙂 Picture this – the morning of my college graduation, I decide to curl my bangs. Just a little curl under so they’re not in my face. Turn on my curling iron, put on make-up while curling iron warms up. I hear a snap, but don’t think much of it, and honestly, how could I have guessed that snap meant the heat regulator on my trusty curling iron just broke? In hindsight, maybe I should have noticed when I picked the curling iron up that the counter on which the curling iron was sitting was burned black. I didn’t. I wrap my bangs around the curling iron, immediately hear a sizzle, feel intense heat on my forehead, and quickly pull the curling iron away, along with all my bangs, completely burnt off my head. I scream. My loving hubby runs to rescue me, only to find me there with a bang-filled curling iron, a burnt forehead, and five little hairs that survived the carnage, but that now stick straight up in the air (no doubt in fear over what they just witnessed). I cry. And then I laugh and laugh, because there’s nothing else to do. My whole family is on their way to see me graduate from college, and for once, I don’t worry about how ridiculous that graduation cap will make me look. 🙂
Robin, that is the BEST story. I love it!! It’s a scene from a book or movie, for sure. Thank you for sharing it.
I have to admit, I saw your comment pop up and I thought, OH NO – I forgot about our pictures! Will my hair grow out in time?! 😉
Wow, excellent..you had me hooked all the way through. Yes, your hair will grow out, wear it proudly my friend! 🙂
Thank you, thank you!
And the initial shock over my hair has waned a bit. I’m still not 100% sold, but I feel much better. I like what you said about wearing it with pride. Will do!
Great piece! I think I misread the rules too. (rolls eyes) This was a difficult week but it was great to read what everyone wrote. I am really curious about Joey though. : )
Thank you! Joey just might have to make another appearance some day… 😉
Why can’t hairdressers realize women are like Dr. Jeckel & Mr. Hyde? There’s an emotional, irrational side and her cool, calm, collected side. Hairdressers need to take psychology classes along with beauty school.
That is so true! There is a lot of emotion wrapped up in our hair, isn’t there?
awesome!! you hooked me too. you should take this farther. I need to get back on the RDC wagon. When school starts again, it’s on!
Thanks, Kerry!
I know – it’s tough to keep up with RDC. I had to miss a couple weeks, too. Can’t wait to read your work when you do come back!
um a hair story…there are so many – How about when I walked in on Katie who had snuck scissors into her room and given herself her first ever haircut at the age of three. Kind of a tapered-across-the-front Rhianna look complete with red crayola marker highlights. She said “I wanted it to look like Jane’s mommy” – who actually really does have pretty much that exact hairstyle (and rocks it!) I had to leave the room to regain control- sobbing, hyperventalating (how do you spell that?) – I was a mess. She’s five now and it has (mostly)grown out into a cool, layered look.
Oh, I remember that! Katie, Katie.
I can’t wait to hear about Kindergarten. Send updates!
This was great! The task for Red Writing Hood was really hard, but you seem to pull it off with great ease! Love it x
It was hard this week! It involved lots of me staring at a blank screen, waiting for a clue! Thanks for coming by.
All I can say is, “POST A PICTURE!!” You are killing me with suspense. I have to see the new cut. My story is when I was in high school I decided to go ultra short, like your husband’s length short. Yeah, then I spent the next 20+ years growing it out. Then I did it again after my 2nd was born. It is still the picture I have on my drivers license. Remind me and I will show you the next time we are together. Yikes!!
Ooo. I will see if I can get brave and post a picture. First I need to learn how to fix it. This morning I have some fabulous bed head going on!
I cannot imagine cutting off your amazing curls, but at the same time I get it. We crave change, and our hair is one of the fastest ways to accomplish a new look. Can’t wait to see your DL picture.
LOL! Good thing your hair grew back!
And I agree with everyone else, you’re an excellent writer!
Wouldn’t you love to see a picture of the mullet? Well, you won’t. 😉
Thanks for the kind words.